Well, tomorrow I am going to get my Christmas tree from out of storage. Which would be my friend's garage at the moment, bless her heart. And it shall go up. Up I say. Up in all of its glory and sparklies. The only problem is, I don't know where to put it. As our house is so magnificently arranged there is no place readily available for a grand tree. Let me show you some of the options, or lack thereof.
First, we have the kitchen. "The kitchen?" you say. Well, it actually was one of the first considerations since it is the only room that has any kind of space available where we wouldn't have to move much. Do you see it? There, behind the table. By the mirror and that other thing. We would just have to skooch the table out a bit. And there we would be eating our meals and enjoying the Tree.
The only problem is that it's in the kitchen. Who wants to be having to look in the kitchen to enjoy a Tree? I ask you.
Here is one wall of the living room. Though you might think there would be room to put the Tree to either side of the couch, there isn't. So we thought since there is no picture up on the wall yet, we might just have to mount the tree on the wall, horizontally sticking out of course. My roommate thinks this is the best idea so far.
The only problem? Well we might have to get people to sign waivers when they sit there. And I suppose it could be a little tricky getting it up there in the first place.
Then we have our other corner(our living room isn't actually a square, being built in 1890 by polygamists. I think they thought that 4 walls wasn't enough so we have 6.) We had thought about putting it in that corner where the lamp and bookshelf are. BUT then we have to move the lamp and the bookshelf. And then where do we put THOSE thingies? Serious lack of storage in our housen. Apparently the builders didn't see a need for that. But it would look very lovely. Very normal(as opposed to being on the wall, I suppose).
The only problem? Oh right, I already told you the only problem.
The other possibilities would be in front of the fireplace. Yes, we are planning on giving away the big, black monster. If you want it, let me know. So a Tree in front of the fire place. Doesn't that just seem like bad Fueng Shui? Not that we can actually put a fire in there, but just the idea of it seems wrong.
Problems? Well, besides looking kinda funny, I guess none. We wouldn't have to move anything except Blackamous. It would make our bookshelves look fabulous. Eh? Any suggestions?
No, hanging it from the ceiling is out(the ceiling is a little weak). No, we are not going to put it in the bathroom. Where would we poop? And no, not in my closet. Though I suppose I could hang my clothes on the branches. And of course no not in the front doorway. How would we get out? A window? Preposterous. But please, suggestions are welcome.